No matter how adventurous you are, sometimes it can be difficult to come up with new ideas for a date, let alone something that you both might enjoy.
Research shows that when tackling a problem together and learning about your partner, being active together while being intimate with each other, exploring interests, and sharing new ideas while carving out time for talking and laughing together, can have profound effects on a relationship. In a good way, of course.
With the perfect man and an abundance of things to do, here are some do’s and don’ts of dating someone for the first time.
#1) Don’t Be Too Serious
Of course, you’ll need to know the ins and outs of the other person which might deviate to a serious topic, but overall, the environment needs to be light and optimistic. Ask about passions and interests rather than taboo subjects that might begin an argument – such as religion or politics. Keep a sense of humor and try not to ask about how much the other person makes or talk about money at all.
After all, you’re on a date to have fun and enjoy each other. You have all the time in the world to get to the more pressing matters. Having fun in the great outdoors is one refreshing way to do that. You don’t have to pitch a tent, but having a picnic outside will get the two of you into the position for a Q&A session. Besides, at the end of winter, it’s nice to be among nature.
#2) Do Be Honest
You shouldn’t misrepresent who you are to make yourself seem better or cooler. Telling little white lies to yourself and to your date might come back to haunt you should the relationship progress. Besides, if your date truly likes you, then it’s because you’re awesome anyways, not because of some fabricated story. This isn’t to say that you shouldn’t hold back on some information that you’ll probably wait for later to share. Maintain some mystery.
If you’re looking to have a second date with your partner, then remain a bit mysterious. On the upside, the first date is your first impression so it gives you the opportunity to gloat a bit. Perhaps you could rival top chefs of the world or you like to go surfing during hurricane season, it’s your time to shine. Chances are, if it’s something you love, they’ll love it too!
#3) Don’t Go Dutch
Many modern dating experts like to claim that whomever initiated the date should pay; however, you might want to think twice about that. Some men are more traditional, while you might be a progressive type gal. If he insists on paying for dinner, by all means let him, but if you feel like you want to contribute, let it be known that you will pay for the second date. Some men feel really awkward when their date pays so don’t argue about it, let him. He might be open to letting you pay later on.
On the other hand, don’t overspend on a date on someone you barely know. However, if it’s something you know they’ll love for sure, by all means, splurge a little. A hot air balloon with champagne, a moonlit ferry boat ride under the stars? Who wouldn’t love that? If it’s your idea and it’s something special you want your date to try, then it’s an exception to spend on him for once.
#4) Do Be Frank
The first date is all about fun, games and compatibility. You can’t just talk about the weather all night, so be up front. You have to find out if there is a spark, there needs to be some meaningful conversation. Ask compelling questions that will get him to think. Don’t be too brash, but get in his head a little and find out what he’s all about.
Asking questions like “What makes you happiest?” or “What’s most important to you?” will definitely turn the conversation over into adult territory. Again, keep it light-hearted and fun. You don’t want to make your date feel like he’s being interrogated.
#5) Don’t Give Up Too Soon
Sometimes it’s love at first sight, other times, it takes a while to build up an attraction. Give your partner a fair chance to prove himself as sometimes, what you see at first glance isn’t always what you get. On the other hand, don’t ignore red flags. If your intuition is screaming at you to run for the hills, then listen.
#6) Do Stay Positive Through Body Language
If you want to emphasize your attraction towards him, encourage him by leaning in a little closer, crossing your legs towards him and making eye contact. Chances are, if you truly like him, then you’ll do these things without blinking an eye anyways. If you want to get more seductive with it, playfully touch his shoulder or knee when he makes you laugh. Don’t go overboard with it though. The idea is to look hot, not sleazy.
#7) Don’t Talk About Past Relationships
As with any form of baggage, such as family issues, troubles with self-esteem, never talk about your ex’s to your first date. If your last boyfriend is all you can think about while out on the date, then maybe you’re not ready to jump into the pool of dating just yet. It’s only fair to make sure that you’re over your previous relationship before embarking on a new one.
#8) Do Ask for a Second Date
It’s not the end of the world if you get turned down, and no, it has nothing to do with your attractiveness. Sometimes, two people just aren’t compatible and that’s ok. However, if you’re interested in a second date, go ahead and ask. Be fearless. Like taking out a splinter, just do it and get it over with. If rejection is coming, it’s going to happen. But if you feel a spark, then chances are he likes you too. Dating can be a doozy, or it can be fun! If the spark is there, you’ll know it, if not, life moves on and so will you.
Do you have any dating tips or ideas to offer? Sometimes dating is more trouble than it’s worth, but if you do it right, it’s quite easy and fun! Tell us about your unique dating experiences in the comment section below!
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Kate Smith, a self-proclaimed word nerd who relishes the power of language to inform, entertain, and inspire. Kate's passion for sharing knowledge and sparking meaningful conversations fuels her every word.